Leaving something I love behind..., and move on
A bit of the boring background about me. I followed very much the journey many go through - good child - good student - good employee. Five years ago, I was lucky enough to join a great company, and a wonderful bunch of people. Till today, I love the experience, I love the people I work with, I love the profession. Then I decided to quit it.
"What's wrong?" Nothing was wrong, just that I decide to get onto a new journey, and here's what I have learnt by choosing to leave something I love behind:
Finding values and drives.
This is the first lesson I have learnt, and the biggest one. With the help of my life coach, I have discovered my basic drives: freedom (in control of my own life), creating values (no matter how small), challenges (I need to see myself grow all the time). Then I looked at these values and looked at what I spent my life doing, it was clear to me that that was not a match! From the moment of realisation, I started to plan a change in my life. This happened to me 6 month ago. When it came to making decisions, he choice was really obvious when the values are clear, and I know that I would not regret later on.
Security is only an illusion.
Okay, this one took some time (about 4 months) for me to realise. I am married, have a mortgage to pay, in a foreign country on visa, have 2 cats to take care of. Natrually, I start to worry about rocking myself off the secure platform which I have built. But the more time I hestitated, the more I realized when I was holding so tight onto the job, other opportunities just escaped from us - the opportnity cost is huge! Also, in the morden world, no corporate job is really that secure anymore. I worked for one of the bigggest corporates in the world, yet I went through 5 re-orgs in the past five years. Every time, I had to rely on someone else 'up there' to decide how my life will be. Oh man, it sucks! It feels good when I finally decided: fuck it, I am taking control of my own life.
Know what I have to lose, and... is it too scary?
Write it down! My list made me actually laugh: I will spend less money on buying clothes, shoes or fancy electronic gears in the next 2 years. Luckily my savings and my husband's situation allows us to pay for the mortage and feed ourselves and the cats. I know other people have more challenges, but really, what is your bottom line, and for how long? Be clear on that. Face the fear and hopefully you will see it is actually not as bad as you imagined.
Trust people who love me, and just move on.
I've heard a lot of people during the transition stage said: I am not afraid of the risks, but I am just so scared to tell my mum/dad/husband/wife, I am going to break his/her heart! Yes when we change, it's normally the people who are the closest to us resist the most. In my story, I was dead scared of telling my parents (I'm from a traditional Chinese family and the only child)! To this day, my mum cries and she thinks I am destroying my life. But my dad actually surprised me and supported me, this had given me much strength. My husband as well, who has been the most wonderful and encouraged me through my whole journey. Don't assume - they may just surprise you. At the end of the day, they love you and want the best for you. Are you doing the best for yourself, that's all they need to know. Even if they do not get it like my mum, you have to just move on and have the faith in them to catch up.
Life is a progress, and it is an experience!
Sorry I have been writing too long, promise the last one! Just remember this. We are not missing out by making a change! Whatever happens, we laugh, we struggle, we face plunk... It's all building up and enriches our life experience. At the minimal, it is not a minus on your resume, but a plus - if you want to go back to where you come from one day.
We all live this life once, just enjoy it - fully!
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